Tag Archive | Jesus

33AD and All That

You may be familiar with Sellar and Yeatman’s wonderful work 1066 and All That, and if you aren’t you should go out and find a copy. It parodies a certain style of history and suggests that we might think we know history, but what we actually remember is a jumbled mishmash of contradictory stories, consisting of half-understood folk accounts of famous events stitched together with fragments of misremembered or invented details that seem to fit.

You may not be surprised to know that this is also true of our understanding of the Bible. Read More…

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Ten Hundred Word Pentecost

Holy SpiritBefore Mr Jesus went away into the sky to be with the Father, he promised that he would send the air-person-God to help his friends to know what to do. One story says that he also gave people the air-person-God before he went away, but that’s usually ignored.

When the air-person-God arrived, all the first God-liking people started to use different ways of speaking, so that people from all over the world could understand what they were saying. Read More…

Ten Hundred Word Forgiveness

PrayerWhen we do bad things, we should do something to make it better. If we don’t, God is allowed to do bad things to us to make it even. We do a bad thing that he doesn’t like, so he does a bad thing that we don’t like. God likes blood to make it better, but there aren’t enough animals for all the bad things we do, so Mr Jesus died so that there would always be enough blood to make God happy. Now all we need to do is say sorry. Read More…

Ten Hundred Word Communion

CommunionJust before Mr Jesus was taken to be tried for saying he was God, he ate some food with his friends. He gave them all some food and said it was his body, then gave them some drink and said it was his blood. He told his friends to do the same thing to remember him, so when God-liking people meet together every week, they do something that’s sort of the same, but a bit different. Read More…

Ten Hundred Word Resurrection

ResurrectionEvery year, on the day when people give each other sweet things that look like baby flying animal cases, we remember that a long time ago, God’s son came back to life after being dead. This is called ‘resurrection’.

After this happened, he was a bit like when he was living before, but also a bit different. He still had deep cuts in him from when he was killed, and people could put their hands right in them and touch him, so it’s a bit like he was a dead body that could walk around, like in movies. But he could eat normal food, not just brains, and he could also walk through walls and other way cool stuff. Read More…

The man who didn’t die

Rocking ChairThe old man sat in the rocking chair on his porch, gazed off into the distance, and sighed. It wasn’t meant to be this way. Where had it all gone wrong?

He’d had a good innings, there was no doubt about that, but there’s more to life than longevity. He’d had ideals and dreams, he’d led a great movement, but in the end, nothing had changed. No one followed him these days. He still commanded a certain amount of respect, but no more than that. What good was it for a man to live forever yet achieve nothing? Read More…

Ten Hundred Word Atonement

SacrificeThe Big Book of God says that people are bad, because the first people ate something from a tree when they shouldn’t have done. Because of that, we need to try to make it up to God when we get things wrong. A long time ago, important people killed animals or burnt them to make it better and say sorry to God. That worked for a while, and God was happy, but it wasn’t good enough as a way of always being friends with God again.

It says in the Big Book of God that people can’t make things better on their own, and we always get it wrong when we try, so God sent His son to be a person so that he could do it for us. He didn’t make it better by killing animals, like the important people in the old days, but by having himself killed. This meant that we were friends with God again, even though we still weren’t allowed to live in the nice place where the first people lived before. Read More…

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